This will begin like any other post composed after May 21st, 2011; the rapture has not occurred. Whether this came as a surprise to you, a disappointment, a relief; whether you mock or rejoice or bless or curse, it has not happened--God knows. (The book of Deuteronomy: "The secret things belong to the LORD our God, but the things that are revealed belong to us and to our children forever, that we may do all the words of this law.”) I heard and read and listened to so many varying reactions. Some were insightful, some helpful, some hard-hitting reminders; some broke my heart and challenged my faith. One I can recall in particular, a facebook status, remarked something sarcastically to the extent that this person had been left out of a sort of Christian ‘in’ group, the ‘awesome’ group, and as I read it, there seemed to beat a raw spot of my own, a sharing of pain…
An image that has been haunting my mind, compelling to me, has been this: trying to run hard, so hard, the Christian life, not realizing that a bone is broken here; a muscle is pulled there; and I am dehydrated. I keep coming hard back and back again to my spiritual bankruptcy, the imperfection of my love and the love I can receive or desire from other people, the poverty, boringness, and pain the world offers. The hardest business is the business of people; all I give can be snatched away, and then I have no more; instead of giving all and then some, and knowing the Lord will supply. I am so disappointed in people; but I need to be, so I can really love.
This is what a wise man by the name of Oswald Chambers had to say:
“Our Lord [Jesus] trusted no man; yet He was never suspicious, never bitter, never in despair about any man, because He put God first in trust; He trusted absolutely in what God's grace could do for any man. If I put my trust in human beings first, I will end in despairing of everyone; I will become bitter, because I have insisted on man being what no man ever can be - absolutely right. Never trust anything but the grace of God in yourself or in anyone else.” (please check out the entire article here: http://www.myutmost.org/05/0531.html)
I can’t hold onto bitterness, refusing to forgive, riding down disappointment like a stairwell. Take another route.
***
Today my siblings were watching, on TV, Titanic. I caught pieces as I wandered in and out of the room; what I did see intrigued me, so much that I found a web resource, an excellent one (http://www.encyclopedia-titanica.org). It gave each person a name, a biography, and a listing of the most penetrating fact: what happened to them on that night, April 15th 1912? The movie evoked so much pain, anxiety, anger, helplessness, and, yet, a quiet peace--but it happened, and slowly the Titanic stooped into the water, as time ripened, the boats were loaded, panic ensued, and only a few were saved. I poured over that website; Owen Allum, Karen Abelseth, Wallace Hartley; names, some faces, listed with “died in the sinking” or “rescue boat A,” some bodies were not found, some were. Though all passengers are, by this year, dead, I read: that night, this person perished. And this person lived. The boat, slowly, inevitably overcome by water, would sink, and on that night, people died.
I was sad. Saying the least. The excursion to that website was a slight detour from my main task: the attempt to resuscitate my blog. I was dry of things, so much on my mind.
The Lord blows me away all the time.
Praying tonight, pondering and clutching a phrase I had heard today--“Vision without action is merely a dream. Action without vision is passing the time. Vision with action can change the world.”--I knew.
I am living on the Titanic.
Do I get that? Do I see how foolish it is to hang on, even to pick at different wounds instead of going to the Healer? As John Mark MacMillan said, “I don’t have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way He loves us; oh, how He loves us.”
Do I even see these people around me, making way to the inevitable? Unless. I can look at a screen and say, “I would give my right arm for this not to have happened,” but Jesus, He gave His life. This is God’s desire: that none should perish. None. Christians are not the awesome group, but the group of rejects coming to an awesome God.
And Jesus went throughout all the cities and villages, teaching in their synagogues and proclaiming the gospel of the kingdom and healing every disease and every affliction. When he saw the crowds he had compassion for them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, "The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few; therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest."
***
I remember my senior year, one night, after I heard about someone who had come to repentance, had come to acceptance of the gospel--the overwhelming conclusion, what I had surrendered to, was this: “Such a tiny offering, compared to Calvary; but, nevertheless, I lay it at Your feet.” (“All That is Within Me,” MercyMe)
My life, my words, my heart, my conviction; such a tiny offering. Nevertheless, I lay it at Your feet.
“I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” Galatians 2:20.
***
A dear friend once shared a prayer someone had prayed for her, and it has become intensely my desire: I want to be with people who get it.
People who get real.
People who want God’s will to be done in their life--no excuses.
People who get that loving others is a privilege, not a burden.
More than that, though--I fall short so many times, and my attitude is, unfortunately, many times judgmental. Grace washes that clean. Thank You, God. I need to strive after those things, to flee sin and get it, get real, function on “Thy will be done,” and loves without bounds or qualifications.
I want to follow the Lord, and I want to see people responding to the call only God can make: “Will you follow me, forsaking all else?”
I do.
***
I had claimed these next few verses earlier as my summer.
1 Thessalonians 5
1Now concerning the times and the seasons, brothers, you have no need to have anything written to you. 2For you yourselves are fully aware that the day of the Lord will come like a thief in the night. 3While people are saying, "There is peace and security," then sudden destruction will come upon them as labor pains come upon a pregnant woman, and they will not escape. 4But you are not in darkness, brothers, for that day to surprise you like a thief. 5For you are all children of light, children of the day. We are not of the night or of the darkness. 6So then let us not sleep, as others do, but let us keep awake and be sober. 7For those who sleep, sleep at night, and those who get drunk, are drunk at night. 8But since we belong to the day, let us be sober, having put on the breastplate of faith and love, and for a helmet the hope of salvation. 9For God has not destined us for wrath, but to obtain salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ, 10 who died for us so that whether we are awake or asleep we might live with him. 11Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.
These words are life.
“Vision without action is merely a dream. Action without vision is passing the time.
Vision with action can change the world.”
Be Thou my vision.
“But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. 10For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs.
11But as for you, O man of God, flee these things. Pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, steadfastness, gentleness. 12 Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called and about which you made the good confession in the presence of many witnesses.” (1 Timothy 6:9-12)
But as for me, flee these things, and pursue the Lord.
As for me, I will follow Jesus.
Who is with me?
